We’ve been considering the qualities that must be present in an overseer. This week we’ll add another to the list.
Therefore an overseer must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, sober-minded, self-controlled, respectable… (1 Timothy 3:2a)
The Greek word is ‘kosmios.’ Literally it means ‘ordered’ or ‘properly organized.’ It comes from the word ‘kosmos’ which means ‘world.’ God created the world with order and therefore he’d like us to live orderly lives in it.
Several translations render kosmios as ‘respectable.’ It’s only used in one other place, just a few verses earlier. “Women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel” (1 Timothy 2:9). Here it is in reference to what is ‘proper’ (‘fitting, suitable, appropriate’). It’s disreputable and improper for women who profess godliness to dress with immodest extravagance. Instead, they should focus on proper things like self-control and good works. This is respectable.
With this word, God gives us an additional dimension to understanding life. We’re familiar with right and wrong, good and bad. But there is also:
- Respectable and disreputable
- Well-ordered and disordered
- Proper and improper
- Appropriate and inappropriate
- Decent and indecent
- Fitting and ill-fitting
- Suitable and unsuitable
- Becoming and unbecoming
While all sin is disreputable, not everything that is disreputable is necessarily sinful. It’s possible that an action may not be morally wrong, yet still cut against the grain of God’s good order and therefore draw disrespect from others.
For example, I’m not sure you can say that it’s sinful for a woman to wear a $4,000 Gucci jacket to prayer meeting this Wednesday, but it falls short of another standard: respectability. Why is this improper? Because a woman who professes godliness ought to be clothed in modesty, self-control, and good works. That’s what should be noticeable about her.
God values respectability. He wants us to behave in an orderly manner that corresponds with his good order. This includes avoiding all disreputable behaviors, both sinful and otherwise.
Here are two questions to help you evaluate your respectability:
Do you present respectably? (1 Corinthians 11:13; 1 Timothy 2:9-10)
Someone I know once misunderstood how he was supposed to dress for his grandmother’s funeral home visitation. While the other men wore suits, he showed up in shorts and flip-flops. He didn’t do anything morally wrong, but it wasn’t proper. It undercut the profundity of the occasion.
A pastor once dressed up as Spiderman for a superhero themed sermon series. I don’t know that this was sinful, but it undercut the reverence and dignity of the office of overseer and the preaching task.
Because God cares how we present ourselves, we must care also. Respectability doesn’t mean you must always wear a suit or anything legalistic like that. But you should consider respectability when you get ready in the morning, as you care for your hygiene, mow your lawn, maintain your car, keep up your church building, etc.
Do you behave respectably?
But sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints. Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, which are out of place, but instead let there be thanksgiving. (Ephesians 5:3-4)
Respectability includes sexual morality, purity, and proper disposition toward the successes of others. It also includes speech. Filthiness, foolish talk, and crude joking are “out of place.” Mild profanity, silliness, questionable jokes, and cutting sarcasm may not always be sinful, but they are always out of place for Christians, especially overseers.
Picture the most respectable person you know. I bet it’s hard to imagine them saying something even borderline inappropriate. That’s because respectable people just don’t speak that way.
But as for you, teach what accords with sound doctrine. Older men are to be sober-minded, dignified, self-controlled, sound in faith, in love, and in steadfastness. Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled. Likewise, urge the younger men to be self-controlled.
Titus gives some additional instructions related to “what accords with sound doctrine” (Titus 2:1). Sober-mindedness, dignity, self-control, soundness of faith, love and steadfastness. Qualities like these are respectable. They fit with our sound doctrine.
Titus 2:7-8 offers a good summary of this point:
Show yourself in all respects to be a model of good works, and in your teaching show integrity, dignity, and sound speech that cannot be condemned, so that an opponent may be put to shame, having nothing evil to say about us.
All this can feel like a lot of pressure. If you’re like me, you might be shrinking back, thinking, “There’s no way I can live up to these standards.” In one sense you’re right. On your own strength, you won’t be able to live a life of irreproachable fidelity, sober-mindedness, self-control, and respectability.
But keep in mind that these aren’t virtues that you generate out of thin air through willpower. These are the evidence of your growth as a Christian. Keep trusting and following Jesus, and you’ll keep growing in the qualities of 1 Timothy 3.
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Let's test those who wish to serve as deacons before throwing them in there. ”For those who serve well as deacons gain a good standing for themselves and also great confidence in the faith that is in Christ Jesus” (1 Timothy 3:10).